Hi Harry, I asked that question so many times in marriage counseling and it’s complicated. I tended to see the best in people so I was one of those individuals who would say, “She’s kind of obnoxious but she’s got a big heart,” “He’s kind of arrogant but he’s got a big heart.” I made excuses for people’s bad behavior but you have inspired me to write further about what I have already written on this topic. Narcissists don’t generally let you know who they are until you have committed yourself to them. And I was pretty laid back, I thought he was being funny until I didn’t find it funny any longer.

Colleen, (Also still committed to decaf!)