I felt your words. My dad was never unkind I only have one or two memories I’d like to forget but alcohol made him absent. When I told him I was getting married he assumed he was walking me down the aisle. I didn’t know how to correct him or say why would you assume that? You’ve been gone for years. The night before my wedding my sister made me call him because she said she’d never seen me upset like that. I told him I didn’t want him to walk me down the aisle. It’s a painful memory for me because he was a gentle man but emotionally, physically, and financially not present. I feel your pain. You need to put yourself first. Had my sister not insisted I do that, I would have had a different wedding day but as you say at the end I also lacked boundaries. My sister insisted I make them. I love your articles they often give me pause and make me reflect. But for me this one resonates the most and touched me so much it reminds me I need to maybe write the story of my dad and I and my wedding day because my wounds and my husband choice all surrounded my father. Though I’ve written about that before I tend to not get deep enough to tell personal stories about my dad and I. Either consciously or unconsciously. I hope you have the best wedding day! Here’s to boundaries. ❤️