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I’m Your Spouse Not Your Momma
We shouldn’t have to parent an adult
“Please stop drinking like this,” I say. “You need to figure out what is bothering you because you’re upsetting the boys and me.”
My words fall on deaf ears.
My husband has no interest in addressing his actions.
At the time, I don’t understand the absurdity of one adult begging another adult to be accountable for themselves. I shouldn’t be overly responsible for another human being. It is my husband’s job to manage himself.
But he refuses to.
The first time it happens I tell him he has to leave. I will not put my children in a situation like this. They are traumatized by their father suddenly becoming angry while drinking. I am equally leveled. My husband moves in with his aunt and uncle for several months, promises it won’t happen again and I relent.
He has no history of this so I believe it’s an isolated incident. But it continues. The drinking is just an exaggerated version of me having to parent my husband. I have done it for years without truly noticing it.
When he paid the bills late and I finally had to take them over.
When I handled mortgages, car negotiations, insurance, and more.
