Narcissism

Why Do We Stay With the Narcissist?

Even when we are finally smart enough to know better

Colleen Sheehy Orme
3 min readMay 14, 2020

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Photo by Tobi from Pexels

Validation is something the prey of a narcissist craves.

If only one person believed us. If they witnessed what we did. If they could just understand. Sure, it doesn’t sound that important to the average person. Most would say, “who cares!” and “why does it matter?”

But to anyone who has experienced this altered universe, it’s necessary for our sanity.

As if a rational human being finally stepped into the room with us.

And saw our world as clearly as we did — actually spotting the narcissist.

It did ultimately happen for me. And I was thrilled to let that rational human being into my room.

You’re not crazy,” he said.

“How do you know I feel crazy sometimes?” I asked.

“Because your husband is two different people but the majority of the world will never witness it,” he answered.

I should have run for the exit the minute my marriage counselor uttered those words. I should have slammed his office door, raced home, packed our bags, grabbed my kids, and headed on outta…

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Colleen Sheehy Orme

National Relationship Columnist, Journalist & Former Business Columnist. I cover love, life, & relationships— #WomanResurrected colleen.sheehy.orme@gmail.com